Can you please get along?
Nearly two and wide awake, and thoughts of my ironically intricate life are swimming aimlessly through my thinking. These intricacies have everything to do with the heart, which makes it even more difficult that my brain spends so much time meddling with them, especially at such an hour as this. After some contemplation, I have come to a conclusion. Something needs to be done about this silly brain of mine. And my heart...and probably the rest of me. I feel less then prepared to meet life square in the face and say "I am worth what my heart wants most", I still see the truth of a life riddled with imperfections, mediocrity, uncertainty....
and yet still FULL of LOVE. Trusted love. Honest love.
This intricate riddle is filled with people from across the globe, literally. And I have been homesick for each one of these wonderful people, all at the same time. I wouldn't say I'm homesick for the places, just the people those places remind me of. I feel overwhelmed with gratitude that my decisions, even if they always seem at least a little less then confident, have led me to know such wonderful people from so many walks of life.
Might they have been walked differently, who knows, but "might" seems so currently unnecessary considering that my life, looking back, seems anything but unintentional. I am certain people are placed in our lives purposefully, by a Being who loves us.
Monday, January 20, 2014
Friday, October 11, 2013
For the heavy hearts to carry...
Contrary to popular belief, Valentine's day was not invented by the hallmark card company to make more money and give reason to feel particularly sick to one's stomach about that recent break up many experience, inconveniently around this time of year. Conflicting google search results (shocking) give a wide variety of explanations about the origin of the holiday, but there is a consensus. It is ancient and usually is connected with bloodbaths or war.
I will not mince words. I have a very difficult time with this holiday. I think the biggest difficulty I have with it is that it gets to me every year. The more I fight, the more I try to ignore it, somehow in some ways I ALWAYS feel a little less loved on this day. Ironic yes? And perhaps it is the fact that it's been thrown in my face over and over this week that I am, once again, single. The hurting kind of single- clearly and recently and newly single. Not the bad kind, just the hurting, heavy kind. "I was a heavy heart to carry."
I do have a few thoughts of love these days. It's wonderful to feel surrounded by the Love of others and I have been blessed with a life full of love. Loving parents, loving sisters, loving roommates, and most important a Loving God. Taking these things for granted most of my life, it's overwhelming how evident these things have been in the past few weeks, which have been, to be quite honest, some of the most difficult emotionally I can remember. I LOVE that love never stops loving. The more it is generated the more it generates in order to generate more.
I will not mince words. I have a very difficult time with this holiday. I think the biggest difficulty I have with it is that it gets to me every year. The more I fight, the more I try to ignore it, somehow in some ways I ALWAYS feel a little less loved on this day. Ironic yes? And perhaps it is the fact that it's been thrown in my face over and over this week that I am, once again, single. The hurting kind of single- clearly and recently and newly single. Not the bad kind, just the hurting, heavy kind. "I was a heavy heart to carry."
I do have a few thoughts of love these days. It's wonderful to feel surrounded by the Love of others and I have been blessed with a life full of love. Loving parents, loving sisters, loving roommates, and most important a Loving God. Taking these things for granted most of my life, it's overwhelming how evident these things have been in the past few weeks, which have been, to be quite honest, some of the most difficult emotionally I can remember. I LOVE that love never stops loving. The more it is generated the more it generates in order to generate more.
For words like lillies...
Oh how I miss words!
Publishing an old post five months late, I have come to realize how fantastic it is to share meaningful, true, albeit simple words. It is the truth about these words that makes them powerful I think. Just one of oh-so-many learnings from the countless hours of band wagon deep discussions.
That's right, ladies and gents, I literally "hopped on the band wagon" every day for my entire summer. (betcha didn't see that joke coming ;-P) And we did come to love that mode of transportation, whipping through old nauvoo at a head whirling pace of 2 MPH, gracing the streets with our music as a 16 piece band. How many times in your life have you ridden a band wagon?! Now I can say I have at least 100 times. I didn't just ride either, I was PART of the band on the band wagon. Check that off the bucket list. (confession: sometimes when I do unexpected wonderful things, I add them to my bucket list just so I can check them off. It feels that I'm accomplishing something with my life)
Long summer short, it was an incredible, dross burning, out of my comfort zone, wonderful, at times horrible, very difficult 3 and a half months. I wouldn't trade it for the world. Come chat, we'll talk Nauvoo sometime if you are interested and I will tell you all about the stories, the senior missionaries, the root beer at the red brick store, the lillypads on the river, the testimonies that exponentially grew, the living across the street from the Nauvoo temple, the eye opening discussions and quiet, desprate moments of prayer. You get the idea. And just in case you were wondering, consider the lillies, God always makes good on His promises. I am not destitute and starving and I have a direction in life.
Currently, some new adventures include getting a full time job at a daycare/preschool, playing the bass clarinet in the murray symphony and three of my very dear best friends getting married within the next six months. Bring it on!
Love you all, my faithful few.
Publishing an old post five months late, I have come to realize how fantastic it is to share meaningful, true, albeit simple words. It is the truth about these words that makes them powerful I think. Just one of oh-so-many learnings from the countless hours of band wagon deep discussions.
That's right, ladies and gents, I literally "hopped on the band wagon" every day for my entire summer. (betcha didn't see that joke coming ;-P) And we did come to love that mode of transportation, whipping through old nauvoo at a head whirling pace of 2 MPH, gracing the streets with our music as a 16 piece band. How many times in your life have you ridden a band wagon?! Now I can say I have at least 100 times. I didn't just ride either, I was PART of the band on the band wagon. Check that off the bucket list. (confession: sometimes when I do unexpected wonderful things, I add them to my bucket list just so I can check them off. It feels that I'm accomplishing something with my life)
Long summer short, it was an incredible, dross burning, out of my comfort zone, wonderful, at times horrible, very difficult 3 and a half months. I wouldn't trade it for the world. Come chat, we'll talk Nauvoo sometime if you are interested and I will tell you all about the stories, the senior missionaries, the root beer at the red brick store, the lillypads on the river, the testimonies that exponentially grew, the living across the street from the Nauvoo temple, the eye opening discussions and quiet, desprate moments of prayer. You get the idea. And just in case you were wondering, consider the lillies, God always makes good on His promises. I am not destitute and starving and I have a direction in life.
Currently, some new adventures include getting a full time job at a daycare/preschool, playing the bass clarinet in the murray symphony and three of my very dear best friends getting married within the next six months. Bring it on!
Love you all, my faithful few.
For the deserving...
Here is a mystery for you. It's easier to find one seat alone than two together and yet we still prefer the latter. THAT is a mystery and a miracle.
Another one for you to consider, big things are nice but the small things are better, especially if small things are grouped together. People are best.
And again? I DO want to go but I do not want to leave. That is the honest truth. It is exciting to prepare to go out and serve the Lord again, in a way that will utalize the gifts He has given me. People will come from all over the world to feel the spirit of Nauvoo and I get to contribute to the spirit. What an honor and a privilage! It's not even the grueling 12 plus hour days that worries me. As many of you know I have been called as a performing missionary in the Nauvoo Brass Band! All summer, I will be hanging out with 15 others just about as nerdy as me playing for the people who visit beautiful Nauvoo. Can you say dream mission?
It's hard to leave, though. Even if only for three and a half months. Drain my "savings", give a sweet summer away, knowing I have very little if any direction for when I return. I suppose thats what the Lord gave us the anecdote to consider the lillies, how they grow.
How dare you, heart, making commitments without my permission! Well, that's stretching the truth a bit.
Another one for you to consider, big things are nice but the small things are better, especially if small things are grouped together. People are best.
And again? I DO want to go but I do not want to leave. That is the honest truth. It is exciting to prepare to go out and serve the Lord again, in a way that will utalize the gifts He has given me. People will come from all over the world to feel the spirit of Nauvoo and I get to contribute to the spirit. What an honor and a privilage! It's not even the grueling 12 plus hour days that worries me. As many of you know I have been called as a performing missionary in the Nauvoo Brass Band! All summer, I will be hanging out with 15 others just about as nerdy as me playing for the people who visit beautiful Nauvoo. Can you say dream mission?
It's hard to leave, though. Even if only for three and a half months. Drain my "savings", give a sweet summer away, knowing I have very little if any direction for when I return. I suppose thats what the Lord gave us the anecdote to consider the lillies, how they grow.
How dare you, heart, making commitments without my permission! Well, that's stretching the truth a bit.
Friday, February 22, 2013
For those who fall...
Drafting my thoughts gets harder and harder it seems. Obsessed with saying things exactly the right way, writing gets more difficult when there really is no way to say things exactly right. The fear of sounding superficial and naive often causes me to draft a post and never publish it. In my mind, my words should never sound like the chorus of a Taylor Swift song. Actually, that would be one of my worst nightmares. The typical "what hurts the most", "never never never never (to the 3rd power) getting back together", "somebody I used to know" are fine for certain times, but rarely do they dig deep enough to be anything close to cathartic.
This post is about falling. An ice skating outing with my sisters on President's Day proved to be more enlightening then I thought Ice Skating could be, especially in a simple, crowded oval rink. It was wonderful to spend time with my sisters. I think back on the days that we used to breathe each others air all the time, and that was just too much for us.
Anyway, aside from that, I took a moment to observe all the children out on the ice and different reactions they were having to being on a terribly slippery, cold surface, some for the first time, some with a little more experience. There was the girl who was clinging to the edge that needed endless encouragement and reassurance from a loving grandma. Then there were those in the middle who were obviously struggling but didn't seem to fear trying to go as fast as they could and fall every 10 seconds or so. And there was the girl who clearly had dreams of Olympic figure skating dreams in her future. I have to admit, my childhood dreams of being so graceful came flooding back as I watched her. But, I have learned in my 25 years that grace just isn't my forte. I skated on, observing, and wondered how many falls this little girl maybe 10 years old had taken in order to be as graceful and confident as she appeared. I wondered what the parents had taught the children who didn't seem to be afraid to fall.
Simply put, it became really clear to me how okay it is to fall down, especially if it means taking a risk or two or a hundred, even if it hurts. Even more so impressed upon my mind was the idea of how much I want my children to know that it is okay to fall down, instead of fearing, clinging desperately to the edge of the rink. It is okay, even necessary, to fall and to hurt a little. What's that famous Micheal Jordan quote? The reason he is as great as he is is that he has missed game winning shots thousands of times. Something like that. The only person defeated is the person that stays down, or even has no reason to go down at all.
It is wonderful to know that getting up is always an option. I saw many parents, siblings and friends lifting up and comforting and encouraging. Being lifted or lifting others, both sides is beautiful. It is important to be happy, yes, but it is important to allow comfort in also. Sometimes, I just need to be lifted. And that suddenly seemed quite acceptable.
This post is about falling. An ice skating outing with my sisters on President's Day proved to be more enlightening then I thought Ice Skating could be, especially in a simple, crowded oval rink. It was wonderful to spend time with my sisters. I think back on the days that we used to breathe each others air all the time, and that was just too much for us.
Anyway, aside from that, I took a moment to observe all the children out on the ice and different reactions they were having to being on a terribly slippery, cold surface, some for the first time, some with a little more experience. There was the girl who was clinging to the edge that needed endless encouragement and reassurance from a loving grandma. Then there were those in the middle who were obviously struggling but didn't seem to fear trying to go as fast as they could and fall every 10 seconds or so. And there was the girl who clearly had dreams of Olympic figure skating dreams in her future. I have to admit, my childhood dreams of being so graceful came flooding back as I watched her. But, I have learned in my 25 years that grace just isn't my forte. I skated on, observing, and wondered how many falls this little girl maybe 10 years old had taken in order to be as graceful and confident as she appeared. I wondered what the parents had taught the children who didn't seem to be afraid to fall.
Simply put, it became really clear to me how okay it is to fall down, especially if it means taking a risk or two or a hundred, even if it hurts. Even more so impressed upon my mind was the idea of how much I want my children to know that it is okay to fall down, instead of fearing, clinging desperately to the edge of the rink. It is okay, even necessary, to fall and to hurt a little. What's that famous Micheal Jordan quote? The reason he is as great as he is is that he has missed game winning shots thousands of times. Something like that. The only person defeated is the person that stays down, or even has no reason to go down at all.
It is wonderful to know that getting up is always an option. I saw many parents, siblings and friends lifting up and comforting and encouraging. Being lifted or lifting others, both sides is beautiful. It is important to be happy, yes, but it is important to allow comfort in also. Sometimes, I just need to be lifted. And that suddenly seemed quite acceptable.
Thursday, January 17, 2013
for those who fear fear....
Perhaps The Biggest Looser motivation-to-evaluate-and-change-my-life-for-the-better bug has me caught. Maybe it's the inspiring back up music as we viewers relate to the lives of those changing on the show, or maybe it's the intensely predictable but oh-so-effective deceiving commercial breaks leaving us in anticipation for those silly beeping numbers to finally settle. In any case, reflecting upon the past seems to often be at the forefrtont of my mind.
Events have occurred, discussions have been had and decisions have been made in the past couple days that have led me to face the obvious truth that I am no longer the Melanie Pehrson of 2 years ago. Perhaps it's more accurate to say that I have certainly grown out of and from that Melanie that 2 years ago had no idea what lessons the Supreme Creator had in store for me. So many people have been patient as I have struggled, fought and dragged myself through slim, muck, snow, rearenders, breakups, poor scores, low self esteem...all sorts of mists of darkness.
As I have mentioned before, days, weeks and sometimes months I felt like I did nothing but fall backwards, submitting over and over to mediocrity at best, which fortunately blew holes in my pride every time. But something miraculous was happening all along that process that still I'm just comprehending. Heavenly Father is doing exactly what he said he would do! Imagine that. The Omniscient, Omnipotent Being has lived up to His Word. I feel my heart and motivation changing. I feel love purer than ever for myself and for those around me and I am learning the ever-learned lesson that through faith, everything that is expedient for me to accomplish what I need to accomplish will be given.
Sifting through doubts does more than ignoring doubts ever did. Considering them, examining why they are there, analyzing their validity and putting them in their proper place is much more effective for me than pushing them aside, trying to avoid, fearing that some great truth might come by and, Heaven forbid, help me realize that I might need to change a few things.
These are the scattered 1:30AM thoughts of a girl who isn't feeling quite at home right now, in a house sitting job in a condo that is not my own. Who am I, really? Not who I was two years ago. Starting now, I don't have to be tied down by my doubts or fears or even my fears of my doubts.
Events have occurred, discussions have been had and decisions have been made in the past couple days that have led me to face the obvious truth that I am no longer the Melanie Pehrson of 2 years ago. Perhaps it's more accurate to say that I have certainly grown out of and from that Melanie that 2 years ago had no idea what lessons the Supreme Creator had in store for me. So many people have been patient as I have struggled, fought and dragged myself through slim, muck, snow, rearenders, breakups, poor scores, low self esteem...all sorts of mists of darkness.
As I have mentioned before, days, weeks and sometimes months I felt like I did nothing but fall backwards, submitting over and over to mediocrity at best, which fortunately blew holes in my pride every time. But something miraculous was happening all along that process that still I'm just comprehending. Heavenly Father is doing exactly what he said he would do! Imagine that. The Omniscient, Omnipotent Being has lived up to His Word. I feel my heart and motivation changing. I feel love purer than ever for myself and for those around me and I am learning the ever-learned lesson that through faith, everything that is expedient for me to accomplish what I need to accomplish will be given.
Sifting through doubts does more than ignoring doubts ever did. Considering them, examining why they are there, analyzing their validity and putting them in their proper place is much more effective for me than pushing them aside, trying to avoid, fearing that some great truth might come by and, Heaven forbid, help me realize that I might need to change a few things.
These are the scattered 1:30AM thoughts of a girl who isn't feeling quite at home right now, in a house sitting job in a condo that is not my own. Who am I, really? Not who I was two years ago. Starting now, I don't have to be tied down by my doubts or fears or even my fears of my doubts.
Wednesday, December 19, 2012
for the college graduate...
The graduation portion of my life feels surreal. In all actuality, most of my life seems surreal right now. But...they tell me I've done it so I suppose I must believe them.
I have now been home from my mission for two years and one day. I have graduated with my BMU in Instrumental Performance. I have successfully learned that grades are really not all they are cracked up to be and relationships are more important than the world makes them out to be. I have attended the temple regularly for two years, once a week, every week. (or pretty close) I have moved to the great city of Holladay (I still don't know how to spell it!) into a great apartment with three wonderful roommates. What tender mercies in a time that I felt like I was getting no where fast! Somehow, with all my missteps and wrong turns, Heavenly Father got me where I needed to be at this time, surrounded by people He knew I would need.
What now? says every college student ever including me. I have many options, most of them good. Or I could just run home, and spend my life in my families basement. I suppose choosing between bad and good has never been a trouble for me. It's the choosing between the good and the better that's the struggle. Oh, and when "best" gets thrown into the mix, well that just may be too much. I spend so much time consumed in concerns of which road will lead me to just the right place at just the right time and forget to get out of my own head and realize that there are bucket lists to be explored and people to care about and relaxing to be had.
I am looking forward with anticipation to a life full of steps, maybe missed, and turns that might be wrong in order to do the best I can at learning and doing what I need to do to make a difference in the world like I want. The ability to create is phenomenal and this is the gift I would like to cultivate for the future. I have goals to commence creation of music, better lives, smiles, happiness, testimony, conversion, families, and joy. What better use of my degree is there?
I have now been home from my mission for two years and one day. I have graduated with my BMU in Instrumental Performance. I have successfully learned that grades are really not all they are cracked up to be and relationships are more important than the world makes them out to be. I have attended the temple regularly for two years, once a week, every week. (or pretty close) I have moved to the great city of Holladay (I still don't know how to spell it!) into a great apartment with three wonderful roommates. What tender mercies in a time that I felt like I was getting no where fast! Somehow, with all my missteps and wrong turns, Heavenly Father got me where I needed to be at this time, surrounded by people He knew I would need.
What now? says every college student ever including me. I have many options, most of them good. Or I could just run home, and spend my life in my families basement. I suppose choosing between bad and good has never been a trouble for me. It's the choosing between the good and the better that's the struggle. Oh, and when "best" gets thrown into the mix, well that just may be too much. I spend so much time consumed in concerns of which road will lead me to just the right place at just the right time and forget to get out of my own head and realize that there are bucket lists to be explored and people to care about and relaxing to be had.
I am looking forward with anticipation to a life full of steps, maybe missed, and turns that might be wrong in order to do the best I can at learning and doing what I need to do to make a difference in the world like I want. The ability to create is phenomenal and this is the gift I would like to cultivate for the future. I have goals to commence creation of music, better lives, smiles, happiness, testimony, conversion, families, and joy. What better use of my degree is there?
Sunday, September 23, 2012
for the broken hearted....
This entry will be a work in progress. A compilation of what struggles and heartaches can do for a soul.
Feelings hurt. Hurting isn't bad, it just means it hurts. Sometimes a lot. And Sometimes you have no one else to blame but yourself for those hurts or event the hurts of others.
The wonderful news, though, is that we don't have to blame. That thankfully, Someone has already paid for those and sincere repentence and changes will help our broken hearts more easily be filled with love and happiness and hope.
Many successes have come from this past week. I comprehend how much Heavenly Father is there for me and how His Son Jesus Christ can and will heal all pain. I'm learning a lot about understanding and accepting and doing God's will, how our agency is key in this plan, even as much as I don't want to have to make difficult decisions, like, ever. I made one this week, and I will continue to make them, no matter what others decide to do.
I decide that other peoples weaknesses or short comings do not determine my happiness. Just because someone else wears this or does that or says whatever dosen't make them any less valued in Heavenly Father's eyes, nor do they have any less of a right to be on this earth struggling as I do.
This is the hardest thing I've been through. Hands down. I hope it opens my heart to a little bit more love. I hope you all know how I love you.
Feelings hurt. Hurting isn't bad, it just means it hurts. Sometimes a lot. And Sometimes you have no one else to blame but yourself for those hurts or event the hurts of others.
The wonderful news, though, is that we don't have to blame. That thankfully, Someone has already paid for those and sincere repentence and changes will help our broken hearts more easily be filled with love and happiness and hope.
Many successes have come from this past week. I comprehend how much Heavenly Father is there for me and how His Son Jesus Christ can and will heal all pain. I'm learning a lot about understanding and accepting and doing God's will, how our agency is key in this plan, even as much as I don't want to have to make difficult decisions, like, ever. I made one this week, and I will continue to make them, no matter what others decide to do.
I decide that other peoples weaknesses or short comings do not determine my happiness. Just because someone else wears this or does that or says whatever dosen't make them any less valued in Heavenly Father's eyes, nor do they have any less of a right to be on this earth struggling as I do.
This is the hardest thing I've been through. Hands down. I hope it opens my heart to a little bit more love. I hope you all know how I love you.
Monday, July 2, 2012
For the Inconsistent...
One thing I must learn is consistency. I consider my lack of consistency one of my biggest weaknesses and have pondered many times how one develops consistency. (If any of you faithful readers have an idea or two, I wouldn't mind.) You know what's funny? The other trait I consider to be my biggest weakeness? My unwillingness to look outside myself and stop focusing on the "I, Me, My, Myself, etc." of situations. In the end that could be a matter of consistency also if you think about it long enough.
It's been three years since I have entered the glorious spiritual university that is called the MTC. How amazing it is that we can do so much with our lives and feel like we have come full circle.
For the married, soon to be married, or the hopefuls out there....
I can't figure out how to get a link so...I'm just gonna explain how to get there.
http://speeches.byu.edu/
go to search by topic
click on relationships.
click on love with the spirit and with the understanding by Marlin K. Jensen
So this may be really molly mormonish of me, but I can't help but post something that made a strong impression upon me today.
http://speeches.byu.edu/
go to search by topic
click on relationships.
click on love with the spirit and with the understanding by Marlin K. Jensen
So this may be really molly mormonish of me, but I can't help but post something that made a strong impression upon me today.
Wednesday, May 16, 2012
for all your prayers...
Warning: Prayer Works!
When you pray for strength, a change of heart and more sincere love, you will have all the opportunities necessary to fulfill that request. This concept has never been quite as clear to me as it is now.
I look back on the past year and a half of my life and think of the general thought processes and how they have changed. I remember that in august of last year, I asked sincerely (maybe for the first time with pure sincerity) that my motives would be purified, my love for others would be more sincere and that my faith would be strengthened. I also understood that up to that point, I have had very little trials in my life- at least ones that were anything more than superfluous. Silly me I even thought to myself "Man, I have it easy!" I suppose that is something that should never be thought to anyone, especially myself. I felt so good and content. I felt the spirit strongly often in my life and had the distinct impression of hope. I also recall feeling a little bit of anticipation for the opportunities ahead. Returning to school, receiving a degree, romanticizing about friends, family and good times. Amongst all this I do remember one time in particular when I received a strong impression to not harden my heart and to increase in charity. Unfortunately, of that impression I had a very shallow understanding. Little did I know how these little impressions would prepare me for the road that lay ahead and for the journey I am still on, probably only just beginning.
Though less than visible, mostly internal, the trials of my life have been refining and numerous, and i suspect they will continue to be. I believe I've forgotten that doing the things the gospel suggests do not eliminate our trials, no matter how difficult or even unbearable they seem...their heaviness is simply lightened. I believe it's a blessing that I was given the gift of determination to prove something to myself and to Heavenly Father. I feel like this big ball of mistakes sometimes, but for some reason I'm still here and every day I hope to say "I'll try again today and try my hardest and my best" Sometimes I wonder if I'll ever feel like myself again. Sometimes I wonder if I should just stop and switch from getting one useless degree to another. I don't regret the knowledge and skill...just the degree choice. Maybe I'll do something crazy like take a photography class or go hang gliding or something amazing that I love. Elementary ed maybe? Every 24 year old mormon girls dream right?
I just wanted to thank everyone for their love and patience and hope. You are all examples of perseverance, happiness and strength. Not the superficial physical kind but the kind that is deep. You have no idea how much of an impression you have made on me.
Some great experiences have happened to me this past year and it has been wonderful, I don't want to give the impression that it's all been dismal and hopeless, because I have learned so much about myself about friendship, love and the gospel. I love going on adventures and it's been a mild winter for which I am grateful. I have had very special moments reminding me that it's okay to keep going and that there are hands, unseen and seen, that are lifting me, rooting for me, and fighting on my side, Just as I know that battles are being fought for you.
This summer has a lot of great things in store for it because we are gonna make it so! We've already hit the zoo, the natural history museum, temple trip galour, and soon camping at Zion's, going to nauvoo to be spiritually edified and enlightened (after a 22 hour bus ride? YIKES!), summer classes, family reunions and so much time spent outside! This summer the sun and I are going to be good friends. If anyone wants any excuse to go strengthen their relationship with the sun also, please let me know and we'll schedule something wonderful.
Today I felt hopeful, which is probably why I've had the courage to write this right now. I was looking out the window and I feel that our pains and struggles are not in vain.
Tuesday, January 3, 2012
for the end of the world...
I am that type of girl. The one that sometimes feels like a break up or money problems or a mistake or an A- just may be the end of the world...who needs to wait until December 21st, 2012 when it all comes crashing down at my own accord anyway, at unexplainable moments? Needless to say, one of my goals for 2012 is to take a chill pill and embrace the future, smiling all the way.
This is the toughest battle I have ever fought. The battle against myself and what I want to know of who I am. Against discouragment, doubt, despair, lack of diligence,
The armor of God has never been more necessary than in this day of age.
Learnings:
1- People Matter, Things Don't
2- Sometimes, decisions are just hard and sometimes, you have to make hard decisions without anyone's help...even Heavenly Father.
3- Sewing a bag using old jeans is a lot better than going out and buying a not as awesome bag for $40+
4- I LOVE children, they say the darnest things and much of the time have more wisdom than most adults. They are a lot more honest too.
5- Things never work out the way you expect them to...ever. But that shouldn't keep you from having expectations. Heavenly Father has a way of adjusting our plans, but he can't adjust what we don't have!
6- Consistancy...without that, I'll never get where I need to go. Practicing, reading scriptures, developing habits, sticking with decisions, praying,sleep patterns (no more of this 2 AM business...I hope to never see you again! Nothing good happens when you are making an appreance) cleanliness, education and learning, family, friends. It applies to anything, really.
7- WAIT!
8- It's okay to have weaknesses. It is okay to struggle. It is not okay to make that the focus of my life. 2 Nephi 2 in a nice, little, neatly wrapped package of JOY!
9- I'm gonna be a seminary teacher, wife and mother. Not necessarily in that order, and not at the same time and most likely not in the way that I think it will happen.
10- The Spirit is NEVER noisy and is ALWAYS still.
Okay this being said, What is MY New Years Resolution, You might ask?
Spiritually and Temporally self reliant by Christmas Day, 2012. This is my gift to my parents, to myself and mostly to Christ. To be able to stand before Him, ready to meet my Maker and confidently say I have done all I can do to not procrastinate, to follow the commandments, to listen to the prophets, to emerse myself in service, to learn Charity. Goals Attainable through miracles and mercy.
This is the toughest battle I have ever fought. The battle against myself and what I want to know of who I am. Against discouragment, doubt, despair, lack of diligence,
The armor of God has never been more necessary than in this day of age.
Learnings:
1- People Matter, Things Don't
2- Sometimes, decisions are just hard and sometimes, you have to make hard decisions without anyone's help...even Heavenly Father.
3- Sewing a bag using old jeans is a lot better than going out and buying a not as awesome bag for $40+
4- I LOVE children, they say the darnest things and much of the time have more wisdom than most adults. They are a lot more honest too.
5- Things never work out the way you expect them to...ever. But that shouldn't keep you from having expectations. Heavenly Father has a way of adjusting our plans, but he can't adjust what we don't have!
6- Consistancy...without that, I'll never get where I need to go. Practicing, reading scriptures, developing habits, sticking with decisions, praying,sleep patterns (no more of this 2 AM business...I hope to never see you again! Nothing good happens when you are making an appreance) cleanliness, education and learning, family, friends. It applies to anything, really.
7- WAIT!
8- It's okay to have weaknesses. It is okay to struggle. It is not okay to make that the focus of my life. 2 Nephi 2 in a nice, little, neatly wrapped package of JOY!
9- I'm gonna be a seminary teacher, wife and mother. Not necessarily in that order, and not at the same time and most likely not in the way that I think it will happen.
10- The Spirit is NEVER noisy and is ALWAYS still.
Okay this being said, What is MY New Years Resolution, You might ask?
Spiritually and Temporally self reliant by Christmas Day, 2012. This is my gift to my parents, to myself and mostly to Christ. To be able to stand before Him, ready to meet my Maker and confidently say I have done all I can do to not procrastinate, to follow the commandments, to listen to the prophets, to emerse myself in service, to learn Charity. Goals Attainable through miracles and mercy.
Thursday, November 17, 2011
for the battles of mind and heart....
I am a piece of work... a work in progress... progressing towards perfection... perfection that only comes from an eternity made of moments... moments that matter most.
1- carving pumpkins after Halloween
2- Visiting dear friends and laughing from the diaphragm
3- Peace of mind
4- The cool breeze
5- Games with my sisters
6- Understanding 20th century homework
7- Days off from marching band
8- Muffled city busy-ness
9- Perspective
10- five dollar footlongs
11- Singing Opera at the top of my lungs in the car with two dear friends that have changed my life
12- Friends who care for me and would give me the shirt off their back if I needed it
13- Eating breakfast with my dad
14- The feeling of the seasons changing
15- Norwegian kickball and getting bowled over
16- Mormon messages
17- Christmas music
18- Play doh
19- Ice cream!
20- Much needed drives into the mountains
I feel as if my life is a busy signal...a dead line on the other end. The phone is off the hook, disconnected fog between what I thought I was and what I want to be. This may be the toughest, most exhausting, most trying battle of my life and I'm not even sure what side I'm fighting for or against. I know whose team I want to be on, but am I worthy to consider myself so? I know who wins in the end, but am I willing? Or rather, am I able?
1- carving pumpkins after Halloween
2- Visiting dear friends and laughing from the diaphragm
3- Peace of mind
4- The cool breeze
5- Games with my sisters
6- Understanding 20th century homework
7- Days off from marching band
8- Muffled city busy-ness
9- Perspective
10- five dollar footlongs
11- Singing Opera at the top of my lungs in the car with two dear friends that have changed my life
12- Friends who care for me and would give me the shirt off their back if I needed it
13- Eating breakfast with my dad
14- The feeling of the seasons changing
15- Norwegian kickball and getting bowled over
16- Mormon messages
17- Christmas music
18- Play doh
19- Ice cream!
20- Much needed drives into the mountains
I feel as if my life is a busy signal...a dead line on the other end. The phone is off the hook, disconnected fog between what I thought I was and what I want to be. This may be the toughest, most exhausting, most trying battle of my life and I'm not even sure what side I'm fighting for or against. I know whose team I want to be on, but am I worthy to consider myself so? I know who wins in the end, but am I willing? Or rather, am I able?
Sunday, September 25, 2011
for the world's impossibles...
I have a few goals (several, in fact) that are not anything grand in the eyes of the world, and yet ironically are completely unattainable by the world's standards. And also quite possibly will make all the difference in the world to me and for me.
In no particular order...
1- Learn to drive a manuel transmission
2- Go hang-gliding
3- Change someone's life for the better anonymously
4- Backpack through Europe
5- Sleep in a snow cave that I made myself
6- Visit all 50 States (13 down, 37 more to go!)
7- Get something published
8- Fly an airplane
9- Win Jess at Egyptian Rats
10- Wear out my temple shoes
11- Build a treehouse
12- Take a porch swing to a drive-in movie theater
13- Learn something new, interesting and exciting every day of my life
14- Speak at least 2 other languages (preferably Italiano be one of them)
15- Have a family and teach them all I know, and even some things that I don't. Especially how to love and how to live the gospel of Jesus Christ.
16- Witness the Northern Lights
These are just to name a few, of course, for it is subject to change. Right now, every one of them seems attainable and I have my Heavenly Father to thank for that. Through my loving family, dear friends and the Prophets, Apostles and the Holy Ghost's guidance and council this weekend, things have been made clear to me.
God will not do something for us that we can do for ourselves. Well, that has been made quite clear recently and I'm not sure what to do with this newly discovered trust completely. But I think I got a step closer to understanding it today! What I thought to be impossible has in fact proved possible, and though I'm still trying to adjust and trust and believe, I'm certain that I would've not been able to realize this impossiblity had it not been for the oppirtunity to make my own decision and act.
Luke 1:37 - "For with God nothing shall be impossible"
I've learned that to be true. I hope that each of you can too.
In no particular order...
1- Learn to drive a manuel transmission
2- Go hang-gliding
3- Change someone's life for the better anonymously
4- Backpack through Europe
5- Sleep in a snow cave that I made myself
6- Visit all 50 States (13 down, 37 more to go!)
7- Get something published
8- Fly an airplane
9- Win Jess at Egyptian Rats
10- Wear out my temple shoes
11- Build a treehouse
12- Take a porch swing to a drive-in movie theater
13- Learn something new, interesting and exciting every day of my life
14- Speak at least 2 other languages (preferably Italiano be one of them)
15- Have a family and teach them all I know, and even some things that I don't. Especially how to love and how to live the gospel of Jesus Christ.
16- Witness the Northern Lights
These are just to name a few, of course, for it is subject to change. Right now, every one of them seems attainable and I have my Heavenly Father to thank for that. Through my loving family, dear friends and the Prophets, Apostles and the Holy Ghost's guidance and council this weekend, things have been made clear to me.
God will not do something for us that we can do for ourselves. Well, that has been made quite clear recently and I'm not sure what to do with this newly discovered trust completely. But I think I got a step closer to understanding it today! What I thought to be impossible has in fact proved possible, and though I'm still trying to adjust and trust and believe, I'm certain that I would've not been able to realize this impossiblity had it not been for the oppirtunity to make my own decision and act.
Luke 1:37 - "For with God nothing shall be impossible"
I've learned that to be true. I hope that each of you can too.
Sunday, September 18, 2011
for the seeds to be nourished...
"Now we will compare the word unto a seed. Now if ye give place, that a seed may be planted in your heart, behold, if it be a true seed, or a good seed, if ye do not cast it out by your unbelief, that ye will resist the Spirit of the Lord, behold, it will begin to swell witin your breasts; and when you feel these swelling motions, ye will begin to say within yourselves--this must needs be that this is a good seed, or that the word is good, for it beginneth to enlarge my soul; yea, it beginneth to enlighten my understanding, yea, it beginneth to be delicious to me." Alma 32:28
Faith is the ACT of nourishing the seed, not the seed. The act in which we have hope that everything will be okay in the end because of Christ and the atonement he performed for us. If it is not okay, it is not the end; of that I am thoroughly convinced.
My soil must be tilled and my daily habits nourishing if I'm to have true faith, and most of all, I must not cast it out by my unbelief, which has been all too apparent in the past few days. Chucking it out, then running frantically after it, plainting it again, having a lack of faith fit and casting it away again because of my fears. Thank goodness for clear distinct reminders that it's not for me to decide what seeds grow and what seeds do not. The Holy Ghost does a fine job about that without any of us trying to mess it up. We have been given so many tools to be wise and logical in our decisions. Why not test it out?
I have another interesting sidenote about the softness of our hearts. Jacob 6:5-6 is a reminder to not harden our hearts. The relationship between hard soil and soft soil really struck me. In order for a plant to grow in soil it must be tilled and fertalized before the seed will grow. Our hearts will sometimes be tilled and sometimes it will hurt. But that is the way the quenching living waters of the atonment will truly be able to help that seed thrive. We will be filled with the Love of God. As a result we will change. Charity will fill our hearts for others and we will continue to change to be come like him. When he comes again, we will see Him as He is because we will be like Him. (moroni 7:48)
How glorious it is to be learning again! Learning things that I love, being around people that care, playing music that is beautiful and loving the gospel more than ever. At the same time, I don't believe I've ever been so frustrated and been so uncomfortable in my entire life. Refining is probably uncomfortable for all precious creations though. "No comfort in a growing zone and no growing in a comfort zone!"
None of God's work ever gets done without prayer. Literally. If there is no other lesson I could've learned today, it was that one. Not one thing in the scriptures came about just because. It was always either the prayer of a family member or friend or oneself that ever got anything righteous accomplished. If anyone can think of an instance otherwise, I would like to ponder on it so let me know. It was a reminder today that we sometimes worry too much about the past or the future and forget to focus that it's what is happening in the present that really matters. That if we are doing the right things now, the future will take care of itself, so really? There is no need to worry or fear failure or pain. In fact, we should even expect to succeed because Heavenly Father expects it for us also. He wouldn't have sacrificed His only son if he hadn't.
I've been extremely grateful lately for the friends that have come into my life recently. There are a few in particular that have truly helped me to find my way in the world but not of the world. I'm convinced daily that the relationships we have are certianly no coincidence. I'm convinced, even, that there are no such things are coincidences at all.
There are certainly good things to come!
Faith is the ACT of nourishing the seed, not the seed. The act in which we have hope that everything will be okay in the end because of Christ and the atonement he performed for us. If it is not okay, it is not the end; of that I am thoroughly convinced.
My soil must be tilled and my daily habits nourishing if I'm to have true faith, and most of all, I must not cast it out by my unbelief, which has been all too apparent in the past few days. Chucking it out, then running frantically after it, plainting it again, having a lack of faith fit and casting it away again because of my fears. Thank goodness for clear distinct reminders that it's not for me to decide what seeds grow and what seeds do not. The Holy Ghost does a fine job about that without any of us trying to mess it up. We have been given so many tools to be wise and logical in our decisions. Why not test it out?
I have another interesting sidenote about the softness of our hearts. Jacob 6:5-6 is a reminder to not harden our hearts. The relationship between hard soil and soft soil really struck me. In order for a plant to grow in soil it must be tilled and fertalized before the seed will grow. Our hearts will sometimes be tilled and sometimes it will hurt. But that is the way the quenching living waters of the atonment will truly be able to help that seed thrive. We will be filled with the Love of God. As a result we will change. Charity will fill our hearts for others and we will continue to change to be come like him. When he comes again, we will see Him as He is because we will be like Him. (moroni 7:48)
How glorious it is to be learning again! Learning things that I love, being around people that care, playing music that is beautiful and loving the gospel more than ever. At the same time, I don't believe I've ever been so frustrated and been so uncomfortable in my entire life. Refining is probably uncomfortable for all precious creations though. "No comfort in a growing zone and no growing in a comfort zone!"
None of God's work ever gets done without prayer. Literally. If there is no other lesson I could've learned today, it was that one. Not one thing in the scriptures came about just because. It was always either the prayer of a family member or friend or oneself that ever got anything righteous accomplished. If anyone can think of an instance otherwise, I would like to ponder on it so let me know. It was a reminder today that we sometimes worry too much about the past or the future and forget to focus that it's what is happening in the present that really matters. That if we are doing the right things now, the future will take care of itself, so really? There is no need to worry or fear failure or pain. In fact, we should even expect to succeed because Heavenly Father expects it for us also. He wouldn't have sacrificed His only son if he hadn't.
I've been extremely grateful lately for the friends that have come into my life recently. There are a few in particular that have truly helped me to find my way in the world but not of the world. I'm convinced daily that the relationships we have are certianly no coincidence. I'm convinced, even, that there are no such things are coincidences at all.
There are certainly good things to come!
Thursday, August 11, 2011
for the romantically hopeless...
Here we are again, bracing for impact. Socially, financially, mentally, emotionally, physically and yes, maybe even romantically. How exciting to be moving toward a goal now.
I am now officially enrolled as a senior at the University of Utah. Marching Band camp began today and I am stoked to be part of a group again, working towards a common goal. To dominate the Pac 12! Many adventures to come I'm sure. I'm excited about the friendships that are being rebuilt and framework for the new ones being built. It'll be an adventure to see where this next year will take me. There has been all sorts of change happening in my life. Two of my dear friends got married today and I was able to witness the sealing in the temple. The reception was great. But what I loved most was seeing how marriage is suppose to be like. Best friends, pure joy, eternally, surrounded by family and dear friends and maybe friends not as dear but still just as welcome.
Sometimes I Ache for that. Too much, quite possibly. Mostly because apparently, I'm not entirely certain the rules of "the game" yet. I've been the same story many times, so many in fact that I could probably predict how the next one will end too. So why read it again?
Then I remember, on days like today, that it'll be worth it in the end. That it's okay to be hurt a little because it just means you'll eventually tenfold more joy. I'm excited for that part.
I am now officially enrolled as a senior at the University of Utah. Marching Band camp began today and I am stoked to be part of a group again, working towards a common goal. To dominate the Pac 12! Many adventures to come I'm sure. I'm excited about the friendships that are being rebuilt and framework for the new ones being built. It'll be an adventure to see where this next year will take me. There has been all sorts of change happening in my life. Two of my dear friends got married today and I was able to witness the sealing in the temple. The reception was great. But what I loved most was seeing how marriage is suppose to be like. Best friends, pure joy, eternally, surrounded by family and dear friends and maybe friends not as dear but still just as welcome.
Sometimes I Ache for that. Too much, quite possibly. Mostly because apparently, I'm not entirely certain the rules of "the game" yet. I've been the same story many times, so many in fact that I could probably predict how the next one will end too. So why read it again?
Then I remember, on days like today, that it'll be worth it in the end. That it's okay to be hurt a little because it just means you'll eventually tenfold more joy. I'm excited for that part.
Wednesday, July 27, 2011
For those precious 30 seconds and 10,000 miles...
I am trying to understand why I always feel pressed for time. Even when I have no where important to be or no one really to see. It gives new depth to the phrase "getting no where fast" and in the process I miss a lot of oppirtunities.
And yet how fast time flies! Seven months and ten days ago I came home from the most influential year and a half of my temporal and eternal life. where have I been since then?
Over 10.000 little miles on my little green car named George (morianhi-moriancumer for short): back to Phoenix, a hundred times to midway, a thousand times north and south on the freeway, probably the roughest 10,000 miles I've ever traveled. And how grateful I am for every one of them.
I've learned that taking risks is worth it.
That we truly come to understand our relationship with God in our extremeties.
That I really CAN learn to play the guitar, though I have miles yet to go with that one.
That my family means everything to me, both present and future.
That it is okay to be me, even when me is awkward, as long as me is happy and can help others be happy.
That Heavenly Father pulls through EVERY time. (funny how often we get to learn that one)
That 30 seconds can be the difference between apathy and an acute awareness of the fragility of life.
That I am quite possibly blessed with the greatest and most loyal friends this side of the universe.
That we may not fully comprehend our influence for a long while yet, but we all certainly have an influence.
That 30 seconds well used is 30 seconds not misused and abused.
That I can find strength in pain, and I can change my ways (mumford and sons reference? absolutely!)
That crazy things can happen in my imagination.
That bumpy roads certianly emphasis both strengths and weaknesses and make it very clear where our blessings come from.
In the past seven months I have had three jobs.
Wedding Reception Center
Home Depot
A Nanny
Seeing the connection? I've learned so much! There are things to learn yet...
School starts soon and I can hardly wait. Though how I will pay, I have yet to know. But what a great way to move on to the next phase of life.
Confession? I have no secrets, just a lot of an unspoken thoughts. I am an open book, however. Sometimes I just want to walk up, take him by the shoulders, and sternly say, "Could you please stop being so attractive?" and then walk away. Maybe I should just not be around when he is being so. That would probably be helpful.
Whatever discouragment tried to sneek in today was smashed today by this scripture.
Proverbs 3: 1-5. BAM! Smithereens! One that I've heard a thousand times and yet still, it answered my specific concerns today. LITERALLY blown open by the wind...well the wind helped at least.
And yet how fast time flies! Seven months and ten days ago I came home from the most influential year and a half of my temporal and eternal life. where have I been since then?
Over 10.000 little miles on my little green car named George (morianhi-moriancumer for short): back to Phoenix, a hundred times to midway, a thousand times north and south on the freeway, probably the roughest 10,000 miles I've ever traveled. And how grateful I am for every one of them.
I've learned that taking risks is worth it.
That we truly come to understand our relationship with God in our extremeties.
That I really CAN learn to play the guitar, though I have miles yet to go with that one.
That my family means everything to me, both present and future.
That it is okay to be me, even when me is awkward, as long as me is happy and can help others be happy.
That Heavenly Father pulls through EVERY time. (funny how often we get to learn that one)
That 30 seconds can be the difference between apathy and an acute awareness of the fragility of life.
That I am quite possibly blessed with the greatest and most loyal friends this side of the universe.
That we may not fully comprehend our influence for a long while yet, but we all certainly have an influence.
That 30 seconds well used is 30 seconds not misused and abused.
That I can find strength in pain, and I can change my ways (mumford and sons reference? absolutely!)
That crazy things can happen in my imagination.
That bumpy roads certianly emphasis both strengths and weaknesses and make it very clear where our blessings come from.
In the past seven months I have had three jobs.
Wedding Reception Center
Home Depot
A Nanny
Seeing the connection? I've learned so much! There are things to learn yet...
School starts soon and I can hardly wait. Though how I will pay, I have yet to know. But what a great way to move on to the next phase of life.
Confession? I have no secrets, just a lot of an unspoken thoughts. I am an open book, however. Sometimes I just want to walk up, take him by the shoulders, and sternly say, "Could you please stop being so attractive?" and then walk away. Maybe I should just not be around when he is being so. That would probably be helpful.
Whatever discouragment tried to sneek in today was smashed today by this scripture.
Proverbs 3: 1-5. BAM! Smithereens! One that I've heard a thousand times and yet still, it answered my specific concerns today. LITERALLY blown open by the wind...well the wind helped at least.
Tuesday, March 8, 2011
for spring break fever...
So I've learned some more things about myself being a nanny...
* How to make butterflies out of colored paper and colored popsicle sticks
* I know how to say no
* I actually ENJOY cooking, but do NOT enjoy following recipes
* "Up" never gets old ("squirrel!")
* Sometimes, sitting down isn't an option. Once you try, you will inevitably be up again in about 30 seconds
* I'm really bad at checkers
* I have an obsession with clean counters and sinks
* It's amazing how fast maternal instincts kick in when someone is sick
* There is nothing more rewarding than helping children grow and learn...I can understand why Heavenly Father's joy is seeing us progress.
* Take advantage of EVERY teaching oppirtunity
Just a few again...I really love my job. Days like today I wonder how I'll ever possibly be able to do this "mom" thing 24/7, but I adore my two girls. Samantha has been so sick and all she's wanted to do is sleep, cuddle and watch movies. Sarah and I have been playing battleship and I found out I'm just about as good at battleship as I am at checkers. Good times.
'Tis the season for marriage I suppose. I was able to see one of my best friends be married for time and eternity in the temple this past thursday. That was probably a life changing moment, and not just for her. I know that's where joy comes. Eternal families. And to be honest with you, I don't know if I knew that before. I believed it. I knew others knew it. I have felt it. But this was different. Three more of my friends are being married on saturday and several others are engaged or soon to be engaged.
And then there is me... I'm doing something wrong. There is this guy, but wow do I dread getting my hopes up ever again, which might put a damper on things. I don't know about this whole dating thing... Arranged marriage is looking more and more like a great idea.
I'm heading to Phoenix with Samantha Williams (I still have troubles calling her just Samantha) and JessiKa! I'm fairly certain only Samantha williams understands the excitment of seeing New River again and setting up dinner appointments and meetings just like old times! Only four more days!!! Look out AZ!
* How to make butterflies out of colored paper and colored popsicle sticks
* I know how to say no
* I actually ENJOY cooking, but do NOT enjoy following recipes
* "Up" never gets old ("squirrel!")
* Sometimes, sitting down isn't an option. Once you try, you will inevitably be up again in about 30 seconds
* I'm really bad at checkers
* I have an obsession with clean counters and sinks
* It's amazing how fast maternal instincts kick in when someone is sick
* There is nothing more rewarding than helping children grow and learn...I can understand why Heavenly Father's joy is seeing us progress.
* Take advantage of EVERY teaching oppirtunity
Just a few again...I really love my job. Days like today I wonder how I'll ever possibly be able to do this "mom" thing 24/7, but I adore my two girls. Samantha has been so sick and all she's wanted to do is sleep, cuddle and watch movies. Sarah and I have been playing battleship and I found out I'm just about as good at battleship as I am at checkers. Good times.
'Tis the season for marriage I suppose. I was able to see one of my best friends be married for time and eternity in the temple this past thursday. That was probably a life changing moment, and not just for her. I know that's where joy comes. Eternal families. And to be honest with you, I don't know if I knew that before. I believed it. I knew others knew it. I have felt it. But this was different. Three more of my friends are being married on saturday and several others are engaged or soon to be engaged.
And then there is me... I'm doing something wrong. There is this guy, but wow do I dread getting my hopes up ever again, which might put a damper on things. I don't know about this whole dating thing... Arranged marriage is looking more and more like a great idea.
I'm heading to Phoenix with Samantha Williams (I still have troubles calling her just Samantha) and JessiKa! I'm fairly certain only Samantha williams understands the excitment of seeing New River again and setting up dinner appointments and meetings just like old times! Only four more days!!! Look out AZ!
Wednesday, February 9, 2011
For the Caretakers...
These things I have learned...
1- Counters first, floor last
2- I could never leave my children at home while I go work unless absolutely necessary
3- Child's imagination = Innocent
4- Rain tastes like lemonade
5- A Song can be made out of any adventure
6- Always plan at least 20 minutes ahead and then maybe you'll be on time
7- Belle, Cinderalla, Ariel and Prince Eric all live in the ice castles of midway!
8- A kiss and a scooby-doo bandaid fix all hurts!
9- Swifer wetjet mops are a caretakers best friend
10- Consistency, consistency, consistency
11- Classical music is very calming, not just for me
12- There is nothing like dancing and twirling to Dean Martain after dinner with two of the cutest girls in the world
These are just a few...more will probably come!
I love my job. Even with the tantrums, messes and early mornings. Day after day I'm more sure that Heavenly Father guided me to where I needed to be. "Wherefore didst (I) doubt?" He always pulls through and continues to do so every hour of every day.
There seems to be a recurring theme the past week or so of my life. "No fear!" "Doubt not, Fear not" He has not given me the "Spirit of Fear, but of a sound mind"....
Developing the Faith every day!
1- Counters first, floor last
2- I could never leave my children at home while I go work unless absolutely necessary
3- Child's imagination = Innocent
4- Rain tastes like lemonade
5- A Song can be made out of any adventure
6- Always plan at least 20 minutes ahead and then maybe you'll be on time
7- Belle, Cinderalla, Ariel and Prince Eric all live in the ice castles of midway!
8- A kiss and a scooby-doo bandaid fix all hurts!
9- Swifer wetjet mops are a caretakers best friend
10- Consistency, consistency, consistency
11- Classical music is very calming, not just for me
12- There is nothing like dancing and twirling to Dean Martain after dinner with two of the cutest girls in the world
These are just a few...more will probably come!
I love my job. Even with the tantrums, messes and early mornings. Day after day I'm more sure that Heavenly Father guided me to where I needed to be. "Wherefore didst (I) doubt?" He always pulls through and continues to do so every hour of every day.
There seems to be a recurring theme the past week or so of my life. "No fear!" "Doubt not, Fear not" He has not given me the "Spirit of Fear, but of a sound mind"....
Developing the Faith every day!
Sunday, January 23, 2011
for the hopeful...
Cast not away therefore your confidence....
How perfectly wonderful it is to know how aware Heavenly Father is of us!
That's strange, I go to write like I've wanted to do for a few days and I don't have anything very significant to write about.
No job yet, but a few hopefuls! Keep Moving Forward...
What I do know is that I don't have to doubt. I've had several reminders that God has not ceased to be a God of miracles. Things may have not turned out the way they were suppose to, but that makes me all the more grateful for the Holy Ghost letting me know that there is a plan. I feel so hopeful after a sunday like today. The Sacrament meant so much to me and for the first time in a long time, I knew and understood the importance of the atonment in my life as a refiner, not just a coverer.
Thank goodness for great friends that do so much for me and family who does even more. I feel so blessed and grateful that I know that I can get through this transition time.
How perfectly wonderful it is to know how aware Heavenly Father is of us!
That's strange, I go to write like I've wanted to do for a few days and I don't have anything very significant to write about.
No job yet, but a few hopefuls! Keep Moving Forward...
What I do know is that I don't have to doubt. I've had several reminders that God has not ceased to be a God of miracles. Things may have not turned out the way they were suppose to, but that makes me all the more grateful for the Holy Ghost letting me know that there is a plan. I feel so hopeful after a sunday like today. The Sacrament meant so much to me and for the first time in a long time, I knew and understood the importance of the atonment in my life as a refiner, not just a coverer.
Thank goodness for great friends that do so much for me and family who does even more. I feel so blessed and grateful that I know that I can get through this transition time.
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